No relationship is perfect, and all couples argue from time to time, but if the arguing becomes excessive — to the point where you re arguing more than you re getting along — it can threaten the core of your relationship, easily leading to divorce.
Although the divorce rate in the United States has gone down — the U.S. divorce rate is 17.7 per 1,000 married women, down from 22.6 in 1980 — experts say the decline is deceiving because the marriage rate has also gone down (by 50 percent since 1970).
As an increasing number of couples choose cohabitation rather than marriage, relationships can end without a divorce. Yet, more and more unmarried couples are bringing children into the mix, making a breakup no less devastating than a divorce.
What Do Couples Argue About Most?
Arguing can take on many forms, from light bickering to deeply hurting words, and all have a potential to cause undue stress, anxiety, anger and resentment.
While it s commonly thought that one of the most common causes of arguments and divorce among couples is money, it turns out this is not always the case.
"As a predictor of divorce, money problems are so minor," said Jan Andersen, associate professor at California State University in Sacramento. "If we look at all the causes of divorce, financial problems can only account for 5 percent of the effect."
Of course, couples DO argue about money. One study of married couples even found that 70 percent reported having some type of money problems, however the money issues didn t appear to be the ones that led to divorce.
"No one is going to say, 'I got divorced because I was a jerk,' Andersen said. "It's more acceptable to say, 'We had money troubles.'"
So what were the major issues facing couples? Incompatibility, lack of emotional support, sexual problems, work, housework and child-related issues and abuse.
If You Argue Too Much with Your Loved One, Here's What Can Help
Chronic arguing isn't good for anyone in the household, as it leads to stress, stress and more stress. It can also lead to feelings of insecurity, instability and poor self-esteem, not only for you and your partner but also for any children involved.
If you are afraid excessive arguing is causing your relationship to deteriorate, v is a simple, scientifically proven technique that can help. At the heart of most arguments is a lack of communication, negative thoughts and unhealthy communication patterns. Letting Go will show you and your partner how to tap into your natural ability to let go of negative thoughts and communication so you can both be more easily understood.
Whenever you feel an excess of disagreements, misunderstandings or miscommunication causing a barrier to your happiness, you will be able to use Letting Go to get immediate relief from arguments that may otherwise have lasted days or even weeks. In short, after applying this simple technique you will have gained the freedom of communication that is key to an open and satisfying relationship.
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